Dancing Geek

So one of the big things that I have had a hang up over is the P-word.  At what point have I earned the right to use it?  Will people judge me for using it too soon, or too late?  Will someone call me a liar?  Will I get stones thrown at me and chased out of town?

Yes, the P-word has a lot of emotion attached to it.

The P-word is <shudder> ‘Professional’.

Well, I figured that one reasonable marker was that once I’d been paid to work in dance then I could use it.  Except I’ve been paid to teach a number of times before now and I still didn’t feel I could use it.

I got as far as semi-professional, or even part-time-professional (I know, I’m totally making these up – that’s what crazy does to you), but mostly not out loud to other people, just as a label for myself in my head.

Note to self: labels are not that useful unless being used to provide simplified ways for people to understand something quickly.  In your head they just mess you up!

The good news

Cause I like to try and end my posts on an uplifting note, if only for my own sanity.

I recently had the privilege to work with a group of students of varied ages and dance experience.  For two sessions of 3 hours.  I don’t remember being happier, and there was a big part of the final ‘click’ that started to break open the mess around the P-word.  Note I said “started”, I’m still calling the P-word after all.

At the end of the first session I realised I had hit what I termed the ‘holy triumvirate’ of career path hunting:

• I liked it
• I was good at it
• Someone was willing to pay me to do it

The first one was easy to spot – I was bouncing around the place, chattering my head off or simply dancing around in the space enjoying moving.

The second one came later when I realised that I had real ideas and experiences to share when asked questions or facing problems.  I’m rarely lost for something to say, but to actually feel I had something meaningful and valuable to offer – now that felt good!

The final one was the simplest one.  I was there as an invited guest artist, they were offering me money to be there.  I’d have totally done it for free too, but I ended up walking away with a cheque in my hand and big ass grin on my face.

Frankly, when I had this realisation (right about the time I read this awesome Ittybiz post) I was actually a little disappointed not to hear angels singing and blinding lights – but that’s what a childhood spent in places like Sunday school will do to your expectations.

And next?

Ah yes, my brain’s immediate and wholly annoying questioning of where this is going to lead.

Well, I don’t know.  That’s been one of my big lessons this year.  And I’m still working on being ok with that.  In the meantime, I try and taper the heart-exploding panic of not having my life mapped out for the next 20 years with the reminder that 1) having it mapped out would cause me to die of boredom, and 2) I’m actually making progress here.

The method

If you believe that you can receive the perfect job, if you only knew what it was, then here’s something that I’m trying out.  Thought I’d share it with you all, aren’t I nice.

It works as a series of questions, so at each step just start writing the answers that pop into your head.  Trust your gut and don’t edit your answers, you can reflect on it all at the end.

1. What jobs don’t you want to do?
2. For each job you wrote in (1): What is this job to you?
3. For each attribute you wrote in (2): Do you mind doing/being this? (Cross out any attributes where you answer “no”.)
4. For each attribute left from (3): What is missing when you think of <insert attribute>?
5. For each attribute from (4): Does this describe what you want to have in your work? (If yes, put it in a list titled “Job description”)
6. For each attribute from (4): Does this describe how you want to be in your work? (If yes, put it in a list titled “Identity”)
7. For each attribute from (4): Does this describe where you want to be in your work? (If yes, put it in a list titled “Environment”)
8. For each attribute from (5): What would this attribute enable you to do in your work?

You’ll probably be able to merge some of your answers from (8) to give you a tidier list.  Give this a title of “Core competencies”.

If you want to, you can now write a personal ad for your perfect job and post it on the web so it can find you!

The result

Because it’s only interesting if you can see what comes out of it, here’s what I got today (and it may change drastically, who knows, but I was curious after using my sister as a guinea pig for this idea!)

Curious, sensitive guy seeks someone who sees his value for mutual fun and growth.

I am attentive, honest and compassionate.  I will bring everything I have to support you.

You are uncertain, frightened or confused.  You need someone to help you work things out.

Together we will go forward into the unknown, navigate the complex and find the missing pieces of the puzzle.

So, what do you think?  Crazy waste of time, just crazy or are you willing to have a go and post the result here?