Dancing Geek

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything, and part of that is because I was directing a lot of my energy into exploring a new technique (to me) called Core Transformation.  But that’s for another time.

Right now I just wanted to talk about how sometimes I can’t write anything down, because before I’ve even got halfway through writing a post my entire outlook has changed.  I can start a rant about something and before I’ve finished the act of bringing my attention to it has changed it.

So what to write about when everything I thinking keeps changing?  The answer: I’ll write about the fact that everything keeps changing so fast I can’t write about it!

A change in focus

The parts that are constantly changing are my patterns, or issues, or unhelpful thinking, or whatever term you use.  These can change so fast that my thinking transforms partway through forming a sentence.  Powerful and also thoroughly confusing when trying to form a post about my thoughts.

So for now I’m not going to write about my thinking.  I can mention that I had a panic about rejection again recently, but then realised that I didn’t need to by the time I’d written it down.  I can write that I suddenly remember how I judge people with my thinking, or react emotionally to what they do, only to then notice that my thinking is unhelpful and have it stop.  But by the time I’m sat down to write about it, or even just grabbed a pen and paper to make a note, it seems like ancient history already.  It’s over, in the past, and no longer important enough for me to need to give it more thought and energy.

I need something else to write about.  Fortunately, I have some new ideas.

…I wrote every idea as a blog post?

Finished or not, polished or not, complete or not.

What would happen if I didn’t worry about writing something that was patently false just because I’d missed something totally obvious? Or if I let myself make a mistake?

What would happen if I stopped censoring myself, making sure everything I had to say was perfect, or a piece of art?

What would happen if I didn’t worry about trying to create value for others intentionally, but let others find the value themselves?

What would happen if I didn’t assume that I knew best about what people needed to read?

Erk!

There’s a part of me that thinks it would be total meltdown.  Fire! Death! Pain! Anguish!

There’s a bigger part of me that thinks it would be exciting, interesting, engaging and worthwhile.

There’s a part of me that thinks it would invite criticism, mockery, throwing of sticks and stones, punishment and ostracisation.

There’s a bigger part of me that thinks criticism is useful, mockery is unlikely and unsticking, sticks and stones are imaginary, punishment is fictional and that ostracisation from those who would choose it is beneficial.

Oh no, Charlie – I think you might have started something.  Questions is, can I keep it going?

Shiva Nataraja, Lord of the Dance by origamiwolf

I promised more news when there was some, and here it is. My Shiva Nata (Dance of Shiva) blog is now live at AdventuresOfAShivanaut.com.

If you’re a fellow Shivanaut or are just curious as to what all the fuss is about then please have a look, and let me know what you think!

Cheers,

James