You know I said I plan too much?

Thursday, March 12th, 2009

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.  PATTERN ALERT!

I’m at it again

Ok, first of all I’m going to take a moment to appreciate the fact that I’m noticing the pattern. Then I’m going to have a moment where I get to sulk and pout about the fact that the pattern has come up again.  Then I’m going to tell you about it.

Shoulding all over myself in the garden

It’s March, spring is rushing towards us with lighter evenings and earlier sunshine, and I’m all for that, but I had a sudden panic about getting the garden ready to grow food.  Food is very important to me.

So I leap into action, I make a list of the food I want to grow, I research how it should be grown and at what times of year.  I do a little spreadsheet, I make a list of what I need to get in the ground this month, and what we need to prepare before we can do that.  I talk to Glyn.  He feels totally railroaded.

Gee. I wonder why.

Of course, I’m all, “I just want to make sure we get the most food” as well as a few slightly blame-y sounding things which I’m too ashamed to repeat on here.  Oh, yes, James.  Very rational.  King of Rationalisation, you are, aren’t you!

Ummm, yeah.  I am.

Well, quit it.

Ummm, sorry.

(Sometimes tough love is called for.)

Back to the plan

Well, rather than needing to plan out the next 24 months (oh yes, I was there already) I’m going with Glyn’s much saner version:

  • build the second raised bed we want for the raspberries & blackberries (no blackberry fruit this year though – gardening is good practice for the impatient)
  • start to plant up the veg patch at the end of the garden

End. That’s it. You could write it on a post-it. Maybe I should have that as a rule for all my plans.

Wait! That’s another plan!

Gah.  See how easily they slip in there?!

And now?

So, back to the moment.  Right now, what do I need?

Well, I know that I *want* to get a load of mental work done (reading, self-inquiry, meditation) but I also know that I’m tired already.

I’m going to try and practice being ok with not feeling like I got enough done today.  Embrace the panic, accept that the end of the day has come and just go to bed.  Do you reckon I can do it?

Want to see more? Try one of these posts:

«
»

4 comments

Joely Black:
 1 

I just wondered if you struggled with sleep because it’s uncontrollable. That just popped into my head.

Patterns will keep coming back. Unfortunately they don’t just disappear overnight, which is just about as annoying as it gets. But it’s totally OK. If you can remember that it’s totally OK to have patterns, you’ll find it easier to notice and change them.

Love,

J xx

Joely Black’s last blog post..The struggle is just as important

March 12th, 2009 at 9:31 am
Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome:
 2 

I had this conversation with someone yesterday (see tomorrow’s post). I decided that when I start slipping into the future, I will either start singing “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” or focusing on how one particular body part feels at that moment (like the coldsore that’s blossoming on my upperlip from where I nicked myself shaving yesterday). That way I distract myself from the big scary GOAL that I’ve developed and can just move forward on the next step.

But I like the sticky-note planning idea.

Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome’s last blog post..Making suckiness good: Lab Rats Week 1

March 12th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
James | Dancing Geek:
 3 

@Joely – Thanks. Patterns demand patience.

@Alex – Let me know how the 99 bottles idea goes. My problem would be noticing I was doing it and remembering to sing the song! But it would certainly break the tension.

I read your post though, and I’m not sure I approve of this whole ‘going outside the house’ thing. I hear it’s dangerous out there! ;)

March 15th, 2009 at 1:55 am
Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome:
 4 

I spent most of the weekend outside with other people! Scary, eh? ;)

Alex Fayle | Someday Syndrome’s last blog post..This isn’t what I want: Hunter Nutall Interview

March 16th, 2009 at 11:17 am

Leave a reply

Name (*)
Mail (will not be published) (*)
URI
Comment